Chibis In Amestris! Or When Ed and Al Go Home!
by Digital-Dragon-Master
Summary: Ashley and Sara, two crazy fangirls, send our heroes home, but a little something goes with them. Several little somethings. Crossover with Gundam SEED Randomness. Crack induced. Don't take it seriously. Edwin, Alrose, Noa TBA, Royai. R&R. Crazy fun.


A/N:

Sara: … Muahahahahaha! The dynamic duo return!

Ashley: I did wonderful things. Sara's obsessed with FMA now. So here's a crossover. For those of you who don't know us (or don't watch/read Gundam SEED), Sara and I created a little random series in which we drag the characters on all sorts of insane adventures. Our friend Mike helps out too. Currently, the characters are traveling through time. … and space. … and stuff.

Sara: AND UNIVERSES!

Ashley: Right. And so, while watching Mirror Fullmetal (go buy the DVDs and search on the episodes page; PM for details, it rocks) one day, we decided to make a little crossover fic with our Gundam SEED Chibis, Shinn, Stellar, Luna, Rey, Meyrin, and Auel. You don't have to have read Gundam SEED Randomness! or have watched Gundam SEED Destiny to find this amusing, but if you have then things might make more sense.

Sara: Or not. We're kind of on crack (figuratively! DON'T DO DRUGS!).

Both: This takes place after the Medieval Saga in our Gundam story line, and spoilers for the entire anime series of FMA (including the movie) will be here, so read at your own risk!

Disclaimer: If we owned FMA, we would be glomping Vic right now. Which we're not. ;pause; Excuse us while we gloom.

And if we owned Gundam SEED…. … Yes, much would be different (ASU!!!).

* * *

**Chibis In Amestris!**

**Prologue: To Deutschland!**

The day was going horribly wrong, as usual. Characters from anime shows were mucking up the timestream. Yeah, what else is new.

And so, the burden falls upon… two innocent fangirls.

"Hey, Sara, stop trying to be dramatic!" Ashley yelled at her friend.

"It's all your fault, anyway!" Ashley's German-speaking older brother, Ryan, growled. "You two always end up doing things like this, huh? Screwing around with the time space continuum."

"Nuh-uh," Sara pouted, finally speaking in normal-style (sorta), "it's the time-space-continuimumuminum." She confused those who had not read Gundam SEED Randomness by including an inside joke no one else would get. She frowned and then turned to Ashley. "Hey, Ash, do you think we still have some magic we can squeeze out?"

"Not sure," The older otaku replied contemplatively. "And don't call me Ash." She added as an afterthought. "… But I know a way we can find out."

Sara grinned maliciously. "You thinking what I'm thinking?"

Ashley's smile curled into one of evil as well. "Oh, yes."

Ryan glanced between the two of them oddly. "Why do I get the foreboding sense that this will end in pain?"

The two girls grabbed Ryan's arms and cried, "To Deutschland!"

"… Wait, what?!" He panicked as they disappeared.

Mike walked into the seemingly empty room and blinked. "…Guys? … Hello?" She frowned. "I have the feeling I'm going to miss something epic." She blinked. "But it's gone. Time for some Ouran Host Club to cheer me up!" Ah, yes, that pack of genius doesn't belong to us fangirls.

No, no it doesn't.

* * *

The German streets bustled with excitement. Ryan stood in astonishment. "Holy shit… How'd we…?" He grinned. "I can understand them!" He proceeded to strike up a conversation with an average man and Sara and Ashley tried to slip away to take care of their business.

"Bye, Ryan!" Ashley called. "Wejustgottagograbsomebishiesandbringthmebacktotheirownworldandthenwe'llbebackfordinner!" If you can read that, you have way too much time on your hands. Like us. Congrats.

Ryan paled and replied, "I hope I heard 'a bite to eat' and not what I think I did."

"EDO-KUUUUN!" Both girls squeeed. "HERE WE COME!"

"Nope, guess not." Ryan face-palmed. "I better go with them and make sure they don't screw anything up… Again… Hey, waitasecond, when the hell are we?!"

He took off running after the two insane teenagers.

* * *

"I'm telling you, we HAVE to get OUT of here!" Ryan snarled. 

"Awww…" Ashley frowned. "But why now?" Her brain was a little loopy from time-travel. Or maybe it was the thought of meeting Edward and Al. Either one.

"Because of the red capes and the mustache and the death and the HEIL!" Ryan responded as a vain in his neck twitched wildly.

Ashley screamed and hid behind Sara. "It frightens me… (Seriously, it does)"

Sara was being more reasonable. "And I do believe this is the place." And she started to knock.

"This isn't a good idea…" Ryan murmured cautiously.

"What could possibly go wrong?" Sara asked as Ashley started knocking on the door as well.

"YEAH, I'M COMIN', I'M COMIN'! JUST HAVE SOME DAMN PATIENCE!" An angry voice sounded.

"Brother, don't swear!" A softer, puberty-touched voice responded.

"How come they're speaking English?" Ryan questioned. He paused and his eyes widened. "Oh, no, you two didn't…"

Ashley grinned as the door opened. "We didn't have to do anything. We're just making something right."

"Or terribly wrong…" Sara muttered under her breath.

"Freaking shippers." Ryan growled.

"Well, who the hell are you?" The first voice asked in confusion.

Both girls turned to see Edward Elric standing in all his glory and squealed. "EDO-KUUUUN!" They glomped him.

"Aaaahhh!" Edward cried. "G-get off!"

"Brother?" The second voice's owned walked toward the door to reveal Edward's younger brother Alphonse. "What's going on?"

"Al!" Ashley squealed. "Puberty remembered you!"

"Um… Thank you?" Alphonse responded oddly.

"Okay, let's get down to business." Sara said as she and Ashley removed themselves from Edward's limbs.

Ashley turned to Alphonse. "We know that you are Alphonse Elric, and that you were born in the town of Risembool in 1902 Amestris time. Your soul was previously attached to a suit of armor. Your experience with this has allowed you to attach a piece of said soul to various armors, but not in this world because it sucks and we don't have alchemy. We're cheap."

Al blinked. That's really all he could do. The girls frightened him, which is strange, considering how long he's known Winry. Edward was fine, though. He was oddly used to strange girls.

"How'd you know all that?" Al asked finally.

"Because, dear Alphonse," Sara replied, patting his arm, "we are obsessive freaks."

"… Huh?"

* * *

The girls (and Ryan) had somehow managed to get themselves invited into the Elrics' current humble home. We don't know how. It probably had something to do with Ryan's insistent prodding and the loss of feeling in Ashley's right arm. 

Edward had had enough. "Okay, who in the world are you? For real."

"Obsessive freaks." Ashley repeated Sara's words. "Keep with the program."

"Or Very Odd People," Sara chimed in. "Either way."

"So what do you want with us?" Ed questioned, confused. And yes, we're using Ed now, because it takes too long to type out Edward, even though we just did, which TOTALLY defeats the purpose of- … okay, dammit, just keep reading. We're high on sugar.

Ryan, who was glancing out the window in a paranoid fashion every five seconds or so, shot in, "Well, you need some milk."

Ed twitched. "Why?" Al started to edge away from his brother.

"Because," Ryan responded casually, "you give a bad name to men 18 or older everywhere."

Both fangirls had joined Al in hiding behind the now overturned table. Ed's twitching increased. "**Why**?"

Ryan now felt the need to be strangely evil. It was probably from hanging out with his demented little sister and her wacky friend. Side-effects. Go figure. He looked Ed square in the eyes and said in an oddly serious voice, "I don't know how to say this." He sighed. "Maybe no one ever has." He paused, thinking over his next words carefully (;snort; yeah right) and smirked. "But dude, you're _short_." We don't own anything Steve Blum says. He is God. So is Vic. We have a Pantheon.

Al leaped from behind the table and tackled his brother before he could rip off the limbs of the wisecracking teen. "Brother, please, we just bought this place!"

"ARGH! WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SHORT HE CAN BE CRUSHED BY A GRAIN OF SAND!!!" Ed ranted from under his brother (oh, man, PLEASE don' let there be an Elricest fans reading this…).

Ryan turned to the girls. Ashley was busy glaring at her brother. "Heathen," she hissed.

Ryan grinned. "I take it he does this often." Al moaned in response. "Right, then."

When Ed finally calmed down (after a long period of time), the questioning continued. "How'd you know all that stuff about me?" Al questioned.

"We know all the stuff about Ed, too." Sara piped up. "We just don't feel like going through all that again." She walked up to Ed and grabbed his hands, prompting a surprised sputter. "And I just want you to know, I cried with you," She stated in a half-sympathetic, half-mocking way.

Ed was too busy trying to get out of the inhuman vice-grip around his wrists to respond.

"And we both agreed your life kinda sucks!" Ashley cheered (?).

"Hey!" The Elrics protested in unison.

"So we're gonna try to make it better!" Both girls finished.

Ed's eyes suddenly lit up. "You guys know alchemy?"

The (fan)girls exchanged a hesitant glance. "Not exactly…"

Ed gloomed. "So then how are you going to make this place livable?"

"We aren't." Ashley said. She grinned. "We're sending you home."

Both Elrics coughed in surprise. "R-really?!" Al cried. "How?! We've been trying to get home for months!"

"We have our ways," Sara replied, waving her hand superiorly.

"We're doing it because we know there are people you want to see." Ashley smirked slyly.

Ed seemed to try to talk, but he strangely couldn't. Al's face turned as red as his Amestris jacket. Appropriate responses. Ashley sighed dreamily for some reason, most likely imagining little EdWin and AlRose babies. Of course, her fantasies don't stay innocent for long, so let's stay away from that before it includes some sort of half-squid, half-human babies that call her mommy (please don't ask; this is surprisingly not referring to hentai, that's the scary thing).

Sara nudged her friend. "Are you imagining those weird Krakken babies of yours?"

Ashley looked down in sorrow. "I'm a widow. They miss Daddy. They're Cyborg brethren can only keep them company for so long." Ashley doesn't own the Krakken, or Pirates of the Caribbean. She cries.

"OTP AshleyxKrakken," Ryan tossed smugly while stroking his laptop that appeared out of thin air.

The Elric brothers stared. They were afraid of these teens. Ed then noticed the odd metal box in Ryan's hands. "How'd you- that must be alchemy!"

Sara shook her head. "Naw, magic."

"And my odd love of this electronic beauty," Ashley petted the laptop. Ashley actually doesn't own the laptop, either. Ryan does. She cries redux. She also likes talking in third person. She should just get back to the story now.

Ryan eyed her fearfully. "I don't know you. Get away from my computer." And we should REALLY be getting back to the Elric brothers and away from my creepy family-thing.

Ed glared at Sara while Al's left eye twitched at the images of half-human, half-squid babies. "Magic doesn't exist."

"You wanna get home?" Sara replied with an attitude.

Al almost went Chibi. "Will it hurt?" He asked adorably.

Ashley, who finally had stopped gushing over a machine, shrugged. "Never done anything like this before. We've only crossed time, not space and dimension. … At least not when we were in the REAL world. OUR world is another story." Sara nudged Ashley in the ribs. "I'm rambling again, aren't I?"

"Just a bit." Sara and Ryan responded in unison. Ryan added, "Crazy midget." Ed started twitching again and Ryan continued, "Imeanther!" He pointed to his insane sibling.

The Elrics just wanted to get home (and away from the weird people).

Sara had an idea. "And just for the record, do you want to run and have hawt-rabid monkey sex with Roy when you get back?"

Ed blanched. "HELL NO!"

"THANK YOU!" Sara yelled in joy. She turned to no one in particular. "Yes."

Ryan glared. "Hey! Hawt-rabid monkey sex is _my_ thing!" Everyone stared at him. "To say. I meant … to say… I've been hanging out with you kids far too long. Just have your fun and get me the hell out of here."

Ashley grinned. "In a moment." She turned to the Elrics. "Okay! Grab anything you want to take with you, because this is a one-way trip!"

The boys started gathering up small things, such as their clothes from Amestris and other various belongings. Al paused for a moment. "What's going to happen with Noa?"

Ashley hissed. "**She was a mistake**." Sara slapped her. "… I'm getting too rabid…" She sobbed.

Sara chimed in, "But without the hawt monkey sex." Ryan's throat vein throbbed again. "Meep."

Ashley cleared her throat. "We'll fix that." She snapped her fingers and there was a **ZAP**. Noa appeared, blinking in confusion. "She wanted to go to your world in the first place, right? We'll send her with you. Who knows. Maybe something good will come out of it." She looked the confused Noa straight in the eyes. "Just know that Ed is off limits. He has a girl back home." Ed fell over. "… And Al will." Noa merely nodded, still disoriented from the ZAPping.

"I will?" Al asked.

"You will." Ashley replied.

"Get used to kids," Sara added. Al squeaked.

"And with that," Ashley grinned impatiently, "let us make many fans happy!" Ryan backed away and put on sunglasses that he stored in his cargo pants. Because those things probably hold all the secrets of the universe. He didn't want to be caught in Amestris.

Ashley and Sara stood next to each other and their hands glowed with electricity.

"Why are your hands glowing?" Noa questioned, still confused about what was going on.

"Just for effect," Sara responded.

"Nerds." Ryan coughed.

"Here we goooo!" Ashley cried.

The girls pointed at the three FMA characters and there was a mighty **ZAP!** The characters left a large dust cloud, and when it cleared, only the future-kids were left.

The girls smiled. "We did it…"

Ryan walked over to the two of them. "Yeah, sure, fun, now Back to the Future, SCHNELL!" We do not own the said movie.

"Fine Mr. Grumpy Gills," Sara muttered angrily.

The fangirls stood silent for a moment, trying to call on their pwnsome fanfic powers. Then awkward silence.

Ryan prodded his sister. "Well, midget? What's the story?"

Ashley winced in preparation. "Er, well… Wemaynothaveenoughpowertogethome."

Ryan raised an eyebrow. "Not everyone is as crazy as you. Be kind."

Sara bit her lip. "We may not have enough power to get home," She said slowly.

The Vein of Death™ returned. Ashley cowered and squealed. "_Please_ tell me we're not stuck in Nazi Deutschland."

"I never said that!" Sara cried defensively. "We just don't have enough power to get … home."

The vein throbbed more, proving Ashley's theory that it was a sentient being. "How much power do we have?"

"Er, well, that depends," Sara mumbled. "Would you rather be in America and a different time, or in our time and a little … off."

Ryan's right eyebrow twitched this time. "How off are we talking here?"

Ashley finally poked out from behind the chair she'd taken up residence behind. "Ummmm, er… AtlanticOcean?"

The Vein didn't like that reply. A small growl came from it, prompting Ashley to cry.

"N-n-now hold on a moment!" Sara cried, trying to keep the two of them alive. "We can still get to America, but we'll have to wait for a bit to get back home!"

"Wait for what?" Ryan growled.

"For us to recharge." Sara answered.

Ryan blinked incredulously. "What are you two, iPods?"

"That would make my procreation much easier." Ashley mused. One "look" from the vein made her shut up.

Ryan sighed. "So what are we going to do?"

Sara frowned. "Pray that we have enough power to get to a place with indoor plumbing and relatively okay music?"

"Sure, why not."

**ZAP!**

The three found themselves in a dance club with odd lighting, dance poses, and afros.

Sara snarled. "Dammit, we got disco!"

Ashley and Ryan, however, smiled. " '70's! STAR WARS!" Both nerds ran off to live their dreams. We don't own Star Wars, by the way. George Lucas does. Lucky bastard. … And his flannel.

Sara moaned. "Great… Alone in a foreign time." Then she brightened up with an evil grin. "To the Queen concert! Time to rape me some rock stars!"

Dear Lord.

* * *

A/N: 

Ashley: I have a policy of deleting nothing. That explains some of the random things in this story. Okay, before you stop reading, this is the last you're going to see of us in this story. It will now focus on the FMA characters and some Chibis from Gundam SEED.

Sara: And this won't be the clichéd 'Ed and Al return home!' story you all know, either. While we most likely will milk a few of said clichés, we are adding our own special flare to this story.

Ashley: ;hits Sara with a squeaky hammer; Flarebad memories.

Ryan: ;monotone; What the hell am I still doing here?

Ashley: ;shrug; Star Wars?

Ryan: ;smile; Mmmm… Star Wars…

Ashley: Expanded Universe books make Ashley smile… … Except for last eight pages of Secrets of the Jedi… … Which we don't own. Or else last eight pages not exist.

Ryan: Except for declaration of love. Mmm… Hawt Jedi love.

Sara: This is too creepy.

Ashley: So says the girl who wants to go rape her some rock stars, one of whom who's mostly gay.

Sara: He's sexy! (Referring to Freddie Mercury)

Ryan: … Wow, this has seriously deteriorated.

Girls: From what?

Ryan: Point.

Girls: Review and enjoy! Next chapter coming … later!


End file.
